When I was young, I was sexually assaulted.
I bottled up the feelings and emotions I had experienced, faked my way through therapy, and pretended that I was just fine. I cut off all my emotions and pretended nothing that had happened hurt me.
Throughout highschool and even into college, I carried my lack of love like a badge of honor. Not only did I not care about relationships, but I actively prevented people from getting "too close." I cut off all my emotions and refused to feel, because any sort of feeling inevitably meant I would feel pain.
What I didn't realize was that the love that I had cut off was still something I needed. This led to many desperate acts to feel something, anything, more than feeling worthless and alone. Partying, sleeping around, you name it. I felt like I got sucked down a rabbit-hole.
These lies I believed about myself led to binge eating and yo-yo dieting.
I surrounded myself with people who took even greater advantage of me, because that's what I believed I was worth.
Despite my skills and abilities, I found myself failing consistently. Something always held me back from reaching my goals.
Experiencing trauma so young taught me that no one could care for me better than I cared for myself. Not my parents, not my friends, not even God. So, everything I did was intended to protect me: to help me feel safe. What really happened is that I was slowly falling apart inside, and taking it out on everyone else.
This is what refusing to process what had happened did to my faith, mind and body: it kept me locked in a cage that I had no key for.
I know that I'm not alone in this avoidance and denial. But here's the thing:
Trauma can't afford to go unprocessed.
Nearly everyone experiences some degree of trauma. A lot of the time people don't even know when unresolved trauma is holding them back, or creating issues in their life. So, they either avoid dealing with it or forget about it altogether.
This is the greatest disservice you can do for yourself.
Here's what unresolved trauma could look like:
Limiting beliefs that hold you back from success in your finances, business/career, fitness and health, or relationships
Struggle to understand and control emotional reactions
Control issues that come out as eating disorders, OCD, and other mental health issues
The trauma getting "stuck" in your mind and body, and presenting as phantom pains, muscle tension, PTSD, anxiety, depression, and insomnia/nightmares.
Believing lies about yourself, the world around you, or God
These things will keep you from who you want to be, and where you want to go.
What's strange about my time avoiding my pain is that I knew I was destined for more. I felt deep inside my bones that I was destined for something great. And that feeling was almost painful, because I just couldn't see how it was possible. I had no idea how to get from where I was to where I wanted to be.
Because of that, I started working with people every day teaching them the practical tools to overcome things that have happened in their past. And I've learned that the most important thing you can do is this: accept the responsibility of healing.
You were not responsible for what happened to you, but you are the only one who can allow healing in.
If you don't, you'll be living a life of lack when you were destined for abundance.
You'll never reach the life you were meant to live, because you were meant for wholeness and health in every area: spirit, soul, and body.
If you have experienced trauma from an accident, abuse, assault, or anything else that dramatically impacted you, you need to begin the healing process.
You are worth healing.
You are destined for so much more than the life you're living.
There are real tools that can bring you from the place where you are now through every barrier and limitation you've experienced.
If you want to be free from blocks in your emotions or beliefs, free from toxic thought cycles, and to start building the life you've always wanted, start by healing the deep places in your heart.
I'm not a mental health specialist or a doctor, so I cannot prescribe anything to you. But, I have been through a lot of trauma, and I've come out on the other side stronger than ever. If you'd like to learn the things I did that helped me overcome, or even just to chat and ask me questions, feel free to book a call with me here: